PAIN, PAIN, GO AWAY!!!!!

Pain, Pain go away,
Day after day I live in chronic pain.  I have fibromyalgia and all of its related symptons. Life has been tough in the last 3 years.  I lost my job of 12 yrs, my finances, my friends, my Dad, MY LIFE.  Everyday I wake up from my Ambien induced sleep, I realize my body has been invaded by this pain just trying to get out of bed.  Sometimes I wish I could just sleep forever and not wake up and have to deal with this invisible pain.  I usually dont want to get up out of bed, I lay there and think about when I didnt have pain in my life and feel sorry for myself.  Finally I get up and make my way down the stairs to make a cup of coffee. My knees creek and pop as I make my way down the steps slowly.  Somedays I go back to bed after my coffee, or I usually end up on the couch.  I dont feel like getting out or goin anywhere (depression and anxiety have set in) I have had panic attacks so I take clonzepam to help with blocking those panicky feelings so I can try to run errands, get prescriptions, a few groceries, etc. 
I am waiting for my appeal with Social Security to get my disability pay.  I have worked for over 35 years, I paid in, I deserve it but the govt makes you go through hoops to get what you deserve.  I have a lawyer handling my case, but it is such a SLOW process.  I am now waiting for 6-18mths to get a favorable appealed decision and get my back pay, which is now 2 years worth of benefits, (approx $35,000) so close, but so far.  I was approved by my city pension plan a year ago based on depression, not fibromyalgia, so I do get that disability benefit but $625 doesnt go very far in a month.
 I worry, what will I do once my money is gone, which I calculate will be in about 7-8 months.  Will I lose my home?  Where will I go?  This is what I worry about on a daily basis. I dont hold out much hope that the govt will get me  my favorable decision in 6 mths time and get me disability backpay and monthly payments. Im sure it will take the full 18 mths.
I do visit my psychologist once a month, she in fact told me that writing a blog would be good therapy for me so here I am starting out today with MY first blog.  That is all for today, maybe, just maybe, I will have a better day tomorrow.