Holidays

I dont mean to be a scrooge, but the holidays are not a good time when you have chronic pain and a very small family.  We are having HyVee holiday dinner as I cant cook a dinner with my fatigue and pain.  I am getting better at saying NO, I cant help which is good, but the guilt still remains in my mind.  I feel guilty for not being "normal".  I know some of my family and friends dont understand how bad I feel, or that I am just not trying hard enough to feel better, but unless you have been in my body and felt what I feel, you have no idea of what I am goin thru.  My son told me yesterday, "just work thru the pain",  God, easier said than done.  That hurts me that he hasnt realized and accepted what my condition is, he is my only child.
My granddaughter visited over the weekend.  My son lives with me so she comes here when he has her.  I am so exhausted and hurting, I just want to cry.  I want to enjoy my precious granddaughter but it just isnt an easy thing to do.  I want to do things with her, take her places, but I will pay dearly for the pain/fatigue I will endure after she leaves.  It makes me sad.